Today is day 38 of our sweet little girl's life and they have been the most "trying" 38 days of MY entire life. We have seen the valley and the mountain top at least a half a dozen times each, and I have been sick with worry over both of my children for most of those days.
My Mom has always reminded me since I was a small girl that "everything happens for a reason." And I wont lie, for the majority of these last 38 days I have been searching for some good reason as to why my little girl would have to go through all of this...
This morning, as I was folding laundry, I found myself crying again. My daughter woke up this morning with a stuffy nose- just one more thing to add to her list of illness. I cried out to God- "I don't know how much more of this I can handle!!!"
It was then that my mind ventured into a detailed whirlwind of memories, reminding me of all that we have been through in the past 5 and a half weeks, and I felt that still small voice nudge me and say:
1) You don`t need to worry about how you are going to handle ANYTHING. I have held you, and Sophie in my arms from day one, and will continue to hold you all in the days to come. I have, and will continue to handle things for you.
I also realized some of the things I have learned along the way with these memories!...
2) Pride is not necessary! And God has certianly broken my pride down many times during these days. It`s alright to cry on a friends shoulder once in a while. It actually does release the load.
3) I have also learned how to allow people to help me. I used to carry around the idea that I can do it all myself. However, through these 38 days I have been forced to ask for, and recieve help from those who love our family very dearly. And we have felt very blessed by the loving arms that have been extended!! Thank you to you all!!
I am so so happy and relieved to have my baby girl home safely with our family. Its so neat to see how Ben likes to interact with his baby sister and it feels AMAZING to finally be under one roof.
I don`t know why I felt so strongly to write these thoughts out today, but I hope this post finds someone that needs to be reminded that God IS listening, and he IS working! Just keep praying and leaning on him. Remember HE will handle YOUR needs :)
Be Blessed! :)
3 comments:
Thanks for that post Mandy. I know it's been more difficult for you guys than we could imagine. So many ups and downs. But you're right..God IS in control. He DOES care! And He WILL see you through all of this. And on the journey, we are here for whatever you need :) Lots of love!
Thanks for sharing from your heart, Mandy. You only really get to understand the depth of God's caring and loving heart when you go through difficult times - and He uses the hands and hearts of friends and family to reach out to us when we most need help and encouragement - Sophie's cold DOES seem like too much after all she's been through, but we also know that she's a fighter, and each time she encounters viruses / germs, her body will develop its ability to protect her and recover. Our prayers continue for all of you!
well you'll become a preacher woman yet! that was beautiful honey! God sends people in our path that show Gods love in our times of need, and you are very blessed with your church family and other friends in Essex. God has used them to help you in your greatest time of need and I wish to thank them all for all their help looking after Ben, cookong meals and whatever else they did I wish I lived closer especially in times like this but it is reassuring to know that when your physical family aren't close Gods family jumps in and for that We are releaved and sooo thankful. Love you , Mom, xoxo
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